Tag Archives: Liz Stuff

My 5 days with Maverick

I’ve mentioned my “friend” Maverick a couple of times on this blog.

TL;DR: Maverick is one of my best friends from college who I’ve had an on-and-off again “relationship” with for the past almost 4 years.  I’ve always had really strong feelings for him, and I believe he has for me as well.  However, part of the reason we haven’t been together is that he’s in the military and we don’t get to see each other a lot.

Unfortunately, Maverick was deployed overseas mid-summer.  He was given two weeks off and drove to see me at home.  We had a great time together.  Lots of cuddling, drinking, and sex, as you may expect.  He was only able to stay two nights, because he had to go see his family (which live about 5 hours from my home).

It was super hard to say good-bye to him.  I feel so happy and comforted whenever I’m with him.  Throw in the fact that he was on his way to one of the most unsafe parts of the world, and I was a wreck.  The day that he left, I laid on my couch for about 5 hours and ate a disgusting amount of food.  Pancakes and chicken tacos, to be exact.

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So, the next weekend I had plans to see my former roommate, Robin, who lives about 30 minutes from where Maverick lives (what a coincidence, huh?)  When I told Maverick about my plans, he asked me where I was staying. When I said that I was going to stay at Robin’s, he said, “I don’t approve of that. I think we should get a hotel room or something.”  Swoon.

I drove the 5 hours and met up with Maverick the next weekend.  Robin was working and had dinner plans, so I said I’d meet up with her later that night.

In the meantime, Maverick and I got lunch and drove around. I don’t know what it is, but to me there’s nothing sexier than having a guy drive me around while listening to music.  It reminds me of my first love, when we were too young to go out drinking & were stuck living at home with our parents.  We would drive around, windows down, not having a plan as to where we were going. It feels extremely relaxed to me; I don’t have a care in the world. This is exactly how I felt that day with Maverick.  I couldn’t have been any happier.

We ended up at two state parks right on the ocean that I had never been to.  We went exploring and it was absolutely beautiful.

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After the exploring, we went to a gas station to get some drinks.  We started talking about where we were going to stay that night, and we decided to start calling hotels.  All hotels for that night were $400. Yikes. Turns out, this ridiculously overpriced room was…. worth every penny, ifyouknowwhatimean.

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It was even harder to say good-bye to him the second time.  The 5 days that we spent together were absolutely perfect, and confirmed my thoughts that we could be happy together, if we were living near one another. Also, the fact that he was headed to the most dangerous part of the world didn’t help either.

2 months later, and I still miss him like hell.  But I’m so thankful for the amazing 5 days that we were able to spend together.

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Did ya miss me?

Hello all, 

It’s been a while since I’ve posted – my apologies! As is typical for me, a lot has changed in the past month.  I’ll be binge-writing blog posts within the next week or so!

First and foremost, I’ve moved 800 miles away to a big city! I’m absolutely LOVING it.  I’ve always wanted to live in a city, and I’ve finally done it.  I was nervous about meeting people, but it’s slowly but surely happening.  I even have 2 dates this week – thank you for finally giving me some luck, online dating!  (Hope I didn’t just jinx myself).  All in all, Liz is one happy camper. 

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Aftermath Part II

So after all of the snooping/texting/large eggplant emoji drama, things went back to normal with Robert(1) and I.  Except for the fact that he became really jealous (big surprise).  He was super needy and was accusing me of things for no reason – other than the fact that his trust in me was nonexistent.  This is normally the kind of behavior I would not put up with, but I was still feeling EXTREMELY guilty from the whole ordeal.  

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Robert(1) and I were fighting and he was getting emotional, asking me to be his girlfriend.  On the third time this happened in 2 weeks, I agreed.  It didn’t feel real to me, as I knew I was doing it just to make him happy.  I only told one of my friends about it.

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maybe it won’t have to deal with reality if I don’t tell anyone!

10 days later, we broke up.  Turns out, it doesn’t work when you agree to be in a relationship out of guilt.  The real question is——- why did I let him influence me into doing something I had no desire to do?  This is extremely out of character for me and makes me angry at myself.  

Here’s the lesson kids: Listen to your gut.

Breaking Up is Hard to do

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As I mentioned before, Evelyn & I broke up 4 months ago.  She did not take the break up well at all. A month prior, I tried (unsuccessfully) to break up with her, but she wouldn’t let me.  Trust me, I tried, but this girl is persistent.  I continued with the relationship for about another month or so, but then decided that I couldn’t do it anymore. 

Not surprisingly, she didn’t take it well.  Against my better judgement, we continued to talk here and there and we eventually met up for a drink one evening.

Mistake. 

This turned into several drinks and both of us got emotional, but for different reasons (unbeknownst to her).  I had just received bad news the day before and was really messed up over that, not about our relationship.  We ended up crying in my car and she kissed me.  I felt SO terrible when that happened because I KNEW this opened the flood gates to something I did not want.  Oy vey.

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We continued to talk here and there, (about normal things, not about us) for the next few weeks.  She wanted to meet up, but I kept making up excuses.  I eventually had to send her a very well thought out e-mail explaining why we shouldn’t talk anymore.  I spoke to a mutual friend who told me all the things Evelyn was saying to her about us.  She truly believed deep down that I really wanted to be with her and that I was still in love with her, which wasn’t even slightly true.  This really made me feel horrible and I decided that I needed to cut off communication.  

Again, she did not take this well.  She continued to call and text me, leaving a voicemail here and there as well.  Once, she just sent me the following picture:

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…… anyone know what the proper response to this is??

The story ended (or so I think) 2 weeks ago.  I was sitting in my room doing homework, when I hear a knock on the door—

to be continued!!

Serious Relationships in your 20’s

Hi all, 

I’ve been thinking lately: what’s the prognosis for relationships in your 20’s?

This question came to mind recently because of multiple conversations I’ve had with friends about Robert & I.  Things have been going pretty well, and we’ve been seeing each other for about 3 months – which, as one of my friends put it, “3 months is when you either gotta shit or get off the pot.”  Lovely.

This makes me uneasy. Although Robert & I have had a conversation about “what we are,” we are still in some weird limbo between being single & in a relationship.  Deep down, I know that this is for the best, but I can’t help but feel some pressure to either “shit or get off the pot” as my lovely friend put it.  I’m just having trouble finding the source of this pressure.

Do I feel like I need the label? Maybe.

Do I not want him to date anyone else? Not right now.

Do I want to date other people? Not right now, but when I move to the new city, yes. And Maverick & I still talk every day and FaceTime at least once a week, which I don’t want to give up.

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Hannah, you just get me.

Another huge reason why I think this has been bothering me is other people’s reaction when I explain the situation.  I’m not one to care about what other people think, but I’m starting to feel defeated when I explain the situation to them.  A friend of mine, Rose, said to me this weekend, “Well, you know long distance could work! It definitely could work. You know, so-and-so and so-and-so do just fine!” 

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no thanks.

Ehh, no.  The thought of entering into a long distance relationship while moving to a fun, new city does not appeal to me.  I want to go out and meet people, and not have to worry about someone else getting jealous or planning my night around talking to them. I also think that couples around me seem to be getting serious extremely quickly, which makes me want to jump off of a cliff. My roommate, Robin, recently started dating a great guy. He told her that she could move into his apartment with him in September…. after dating for… one week. This made me break into a cold sweat, but she didn’t really think that it was that big a deal.

Am I out of my mind here, or does the thought of settling down in a serious relationship make anyone else a little queasy?

 

Maverick: Part Deux

Fast forward to 2011. Maverick & I had stopped seeing each other, because I had a boyfriend.  I broke up with this boyfriend, and we started to hook up once in a while.  Then he got a “girlfriend,” who I will appropriately call Mary.

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They were a terrible match. I am not just saying that because I am biased. No one understood why they were together.  On top of them being a bad match, he was leaving to move over 1000 miles away 3 months after graduation.  He is not the kind of person to make a strong commitment, so everyone was waiting for him to eventually dump her.

On graduation night, Maverick called me and asked if he could come over before we went out to the bar with all of our friends.  I said yes, and he helped my mom and I move my stuff out of my house.  After my mom left, we started drinking gin on the rocks & doing a puzzle.  Maybe not the most romantic start to the night, but hey, we’re not conventional in many ways.

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romantic, right?

The sexual tension was palpable. He slowly started inching closer to me and our arms were eventually touching. He kissed me & that led to him carrying me into my bedroom.

We got closer and closer when he moved away.  He was still technically with his “girlfriend,” although he told me many times how he wanted to break up with her.

One night when he was drunk, he told me how he wanted to give us a try. It was super sweet and made a lot of sense, although it this conversation was had at 4am. I completely fell for it and believed that we were together, even though he was still technically with Mary.

The next day he didn’t address it. So I proceeded to get drunk in order to work up the courage to talk to him about this. He eventually said how he did wish that we could be together, but with the distance, it wouldn’t work. I understood, although I was let down.  I then proceeded to tell him he needed to break up with Mary regardless, and he agreed. 

This was the start to the most confusing 2 years of my life. 

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mixed signals are a bitch.