Category Archives: Me

My Whirlwind with Spicoli

I went to college. I drank a lot. And it got me into trouble.  Everyone loves the fun, sloppy drunk girl when you’re a college senior, but 3 years postgrad, it’s not so cute anymore.

This is why I pretty much stopped “going out to go out”. I still drink, but the goal and locations have changed.  Aka: it’s pretty rare now a days that I go out to get wasted and go to seedy college bars or clubs.  I’m more likely to go to cheap dive bars or just casually drink at friends’ apartments.

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Moral of the story – I don’t go out drinking a lot anymore because I don’t trust myself not to do stupid things.  I also don’t enjoy clubs the way I used to. Well, guess what happened the one time I went out this summer??

I got sloppy drunk and had sex with a guy I met twice.  Typically, I would wake up hating myself, but you know what?

chandler

Here’s what happened: On a Tuesday night, I went out to dinner with my friend, Anne Marie, and her parents. Anne Marie has been one of my best friends since I was little, but we’ve drifted apart a little bit. She likes to party at the “cool bars” (aka ones flooded by losers we went to high school with and cost a ton of money), and I’m not into that scene anymore. Anyways, our server at this restaurant was one of her friends that she goes out with a lot.  I thought he was pretty cute. Not in a typically attractive way, but in a sexy-unemployed-haven’t-showered-grungy kind of way.  We will refer to him as Spicoli.

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At the end of dinner, he sat down and had a glass of wine with us.  We started talking and Spicoli and Anne Marie started telling me about a party the next day. Anne Marie, always the wingwoman (especially after 4 glasses of wine), said “Spicoli, take her number, maybe you can convince her to come out because I never can.”  So I did.

He texted me to come out to the party, but I didn’t go because I really didn’t want to I was super busy.  Then he asked me to get a drink the next Friday. Afterwards, Anne Marie was having people over for dinner and was going to go out.  So that was our plan.

I had a great time with him on our date.  He has very interesting qualities about him. I found conversation with him to flow easily, and he’s definitely one of the most open-minded guys I’ve ever met in my life.  He was so open with his emotions, which I found to be so attractive. He doesn’t have a degree or a steady job, but has traveled the world.  And his hair is about as long as mine. Basically, I’ve never really dated anyone like him. I typically go for “safe” guys – for example, the boyfriend I had senior year of college was athletic, handsome, came from the perfect family, went to grad school, and is the smartest person I’ve ever known (triple major, got a perfect score on his math GRE).  His “perfectness” freaked me out – and I ended up cheating on him with a guy who had a long-term girlfriend (and also had long hair now that I think about it.

Things just felt different with him. I told him up front about my relationship with Evelyn, which is something I don’t tell guys until we’ve been dating for a couple of months.  Spicoli didn’t blink an eye.  Open-mindedness is such a turn on for me.

Fast forward to the end of the night – we’re making out, at a club, between shots of fireball. I go back with him to his apartment, and have amazing sex.

I felt like I could be myself with someone for the first time… ever. He didn’t judge me; he completely accepted me for who I was. I left a week later, but we went out a few more times, and the sex got better and better each time.

I really took away something valuable from the whole Spicoli experience: I need to stop going for the “safe” guys.  Maybe later on in my life, when I need more stability and consistency, will the safe guys be a better option for me.  For now, I need to stop getting sucked into relationships I’m not interested in just because there’s nothing wrong with the guy. I can’t get tied down, I have way too much craziness left in me! Right, B?

bey

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“Don’t kiss anybody & watch lots of TV”

Those were the words from my doctor yesterday. I came down with strep throat. Ouch. My throat was on fire, it hurt to swallow, and I had a pounding headache. He prescribed an antibiotic along with his words of wisdom.

Robert & I would usually be hanging out on a Friday night, but with my sickness we didn’t. We were texting here and there throughout the night. I was feeling like hell and was watching movies. Around midnight he texted me, “Come over.”

Um, excuse me?

I’d like to point out that he NEVER booty calls me. Ever. And he decided that tonight would be the night to do so? I don’t know about anyone else, but the thought of having sex with someone with a contagious throat infection does not do anything for me. I responded by saying that my doctor specifically told me not to kiss anyone and that I’d be tempted to do so if I came over (cheesy, I know). I also said that if he wanted to stop by tomorrow, that I wouldn’t mind.

To which, he didn’t respond. This is very unusual for him and left me thinking…. Wtf?!

Around 11:00am, he showed up knocking on my door. I am feeling 1000x better today so I didn’t mind at all. He said that he was on his was to the library and he was going to leave in a few minutes.

One hour goes by, then another, then another. We just laid on my bed cuddling, watching TV, and chatting. He kept trying to kiss me, but I told him to cut it out, because I don’t want the blame for getting him sick.

I could see in his eyes that he wanted to do more than just kiss me. But I’m still thinking…. Dude, you know I’m sick!! Why not just wait a few days? Anyways, he started kissing my neck and stomach, and things just kind of…. progressed from there. What happened next?

We had sex. Without kissing on the mouth.

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This was a first for me. Even more surprising than the fact that I went along with the unspoken agreement not to kiss on the mouth was the fact that it was so amazing. It usually takes a lot of action before I can cross the finish line, shall I say, but it happened in under 5 minutes. Wow. I’m still shocked. How was I so turned on without kissing him? I’m certainly not complaining, but… I can’t figure it out.

Who thinks that Robert is going to get sick? I’m thinking…… yes.

Liz

Dating Charades

Now it’s time to introduce you to the people in my dating life.  Hope you have a pen & pencil ready… things are about to get confusing pretty fast!

Maverick – oh, Maverick.  Where to begin with you.  Maverick & I worked together during college & had lots of mutual friends.  We started dating each other in secret and had a very tumultuous, on and off again “relationship.”  I experience the highest of highs AND the lowest of lows with him.  He plays games & drives me fucking crazy…. but I can’t quit him.  Maverick currently lives a zillion miles away because he’s in the military.  Part of the reason I created this blog is to sort out my feelings about him and our relationship.  Lots more about him later.

Robert – Robert is my next door neighbor and attends grad school at the same school as me.  We met during a huge snow storm, because he came over to help me shovel out my driveway (aww).  He is kind, sweet, and the sex is ah-may-zing.  We recently had the DTR (define the relationship) talk, where he expressed that he would have already asked me to be his girlfriend if I was not moving to the new city.

Evleyn – is my ex-girlfriend. This might be a good time to point out that I have had 2 girlfriends.  Anyways, Evelyn and I dated for 8 months and broke up about 4 months ago.  We had a decent relationship, but there were a lot of issues which I won’t bore you with here.  I decided to end the relationship, which she didn’t take too well.  It’s four months later and she’s still acting crazy.  Calling, texting, sending me a 3 month belated birthday present, SHOWING UP AT MY DOOR with a 4 page hand written note…. I kid you not.

I’ll stick with these three main players, as they’re the only people in my dating life right now.   They all are beautiful, kind people with lots of quirks & flaws.  They make my life complicated, lovely, & completely frustrating at times.

On that note… goodnight!

Liz